I'd Like to Play Alone, Please: Essays
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- Create Date：2022-06-28 14:16:41
- Update Date：2025-09-23
- Status：finish
- Author：Tom Segura
- ISBN：1538704633
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Summary
From Tom Segura， the massively successful stand-up comedian and co-host of chart-topping podcasts “2 Bears 1 Cave” and “Your Mom’s House，” hilarious real-life stories of parenting， celebrity encounters， youthful mistakes， misanthropy， and so much more。
Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice。 But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly， all while parenting two young children， he desperately needs a second to himself。 It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat， which is why his son’s （ruthless） first full sentence， “I’d like to play alone， please，” has since become his mantra。
In this collection of stories， Tom combines his signature curmudgeonly humor with a revealing look at some of the ridiculous situations that shaped him and the ludicrous characters who always seem to seek him out。 The stories feature hilarious anecdotes about Tom's time on the road， including some surreal encounters with celebrities at airports; his unfiltered South American family; the trials and tribulations of parenting young children with bizarrely morbid interests; and， perhaps most memorably， experiences with his dad who， like any good Baby Boomer father， loves to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments。 All of this is enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet。
I’D LIKE TO PLAY ALONE， PLEASE will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane， sometimes you just need to be alone。
Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice。 But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly， all while parenting two young children， he desperately needs a second to himself。 It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat， which is why his son’s （ruthless） first full sentence， “I’d like to play alone， please，” has since become his mantra。
In this collection of stories， Tom combines his signature curmudgeonly humor with a revealing look at some of the ridiculous situations that shaped him and the ludicrous characters who always seem to seek him out。 The stories feature hilarious anecdotes about Tom's time on the road， including some surreal encounters with celebrities at airports; his unfiltered South American family; the trials and tribulations of parenting young children with bizarrely morbid interests; and， perhaps most memorably， experiences with his dad who， like any good Baby Boomer father， loves to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments。 All of this is enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet。
I’D LIKE TO PLAY ALONE， PLEASE will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane， sometimes you just need to be alone。
Reviews
Kara
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Hilariously funny！
Maddy
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I'm a huge fan of Tom， Christina， Bert， YMH， and all that their world encompasses。 That being said， even if you're a casual consumer， this book is laugh out loud funny and captivating。 It shows a sentimental side of Tom you don't see often with his dry sense of humor。 I loved every page and cannot wait to recommend it to people！ FGTRTD！！！！ I'm a huge fan of Tom， Christina， Bert， YMH， and all that their world encompasses。 That being said， even if you're a casual consumer， this book is laugh out loud funny and captivating。 It shows a sentimental side of Tom you don't see often with his dry sense of humor。 I loved every page and cannot wait to recommend it to people！ FGTRTD！！！！ 。。。more
Bethany Howell
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You will recognize quite a few stories from his stand-up specials if you have watched them all repeatedly like me。 This a fun insight into a very interesting person’s life and mind。 I smiled a lot reading this。 I love you Tommy Bunz！
Dex Vaughn
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It’s a joy ride！ Absolutely hilarious。
Katrina
，
This book is simply fantastic。 As a fan of Your Mom's House & Two Bears， One Cave I was excited to read more stories about Tom's life。 I laughed， I cried， and I definitely cringed thinking about the video of Tom's injury。 This book opened my eyes more to how much work goes into trying to create a career in comedy and gives me more appreciation for the people that do it。 This book is simply fantastic。 As a fan of Your Mom's House & Two Bears， One Cave I was excited to read more stories about Tom's life。 I laughed， I cried， and I definitely cringed thinking about the video of Tom's injury。 This book opened my eyes more to how much work goes into trying to create a career in comedy and gives me more appreciation for the people that do it。 。。。more
Amber Herbert
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For a collection of personal essays， this book is pretty solid。 However， I would recommend this to anyone who hasn't already watched Segura's specials。 Most of the material in the book has been featured in his stand-up， so don't expect a ton of new information if you're a fan of his work。 For a collection of personal essays， this book is pretty solid。 However， I would recommend this to anyone who hasn't already watched Segura's specials。 Most of the material in the book has been featured in his stand-up， so don't expect a ton of new information if you're a fan of his work。 。。。more
Deidra Lassalle
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I would give it 3。5 if I could。 Good listen for a long road trip。 I would have loved more insight on how he felt about topics and experiences。 I feel that he is that raw if he was on 。。 let’s say Joe Rogan’s podcast。
Ashley Sanders
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A very entertaining book。 Having written it as essays versus a traditional memoir made it read more like a stand-up special。
Spencer Knapp
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I saw Tom released this book， so I figured I'd go ahead and give it a quick read。The essays are funny， there is no read chronological order， but that works for this book。 He makes some jokes， tells you about his life lessons he learned， and really showed me more of his personality。 I thought it was a good afternoon read。 I saw Tom released this book， so I figured I'd go ahead and give it a quick read。The essays are funny， there is no read chronological order， but that works for this book。 He makes some jokes， tells you about his life lessons he learned， and really showed me more of his personality。 I thought it was a good afternoon read。 。。。more
Cristian Marrero
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Hilarious。 I listened to the audiobook version， read by Tom himself。 Hilarious all these journeys and experiences。
Leah Grillo
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I'm a big fan of Tom Segura and this book made me a bigger fan。 I laughed and I cried。 This was the feel-good book I needed。 I'm a big fan of Tom Segura and this book made me a bigger fan。 I laughed and I cried。 This was the feel-good book I needed。 。。。more
William Lowe
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I am a Tom Segura fan。 I listen to all his podcasts and podcast appearances， I watch al his standup specials and I’ve seen him perform live a handful of time。 So when this book came out I， as Bert would say， 100% going to buy it。 If you’re a fan of Tommy Bunz you will have heard pretty much all of the stories written in the essays in this book。 It doesn’t matter if you’ve heard them， the way Tommy writes will have you laughing out loud throughout the book。 The writing was so well done and engagi I am a Tom Segura fan。 I listen to all his podcasts and podcast appearances， I watch al his standup specials and I’ve seen him perform live a handful of time。 So when this book came out I， as Bert would say， 100% going to buy it。 If you’re a fan of Tommy Bunz you will have heard pretty much all of the stories written in the essays in this book。 It doesn’t matter if you’ve heard them， the way Tommy writes will have you laughing out loud throughout the book。 The writing was so well done and engaging it was hard to put the book down。 I hope this is the beginning of his writing career because it was so well done。 I highly recommend people read this book for a good laugh。 。。。more
Adrian
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If you like his stand up or his podcasts， this book is for you。 Had a good amount of laughs and learned some fun tidbits from his life， but there were a few things I had come into this wanting to learn and didn’t。 For example， how did he and Bert Kreischer meet？ What was it like to be in a horror movie as the comic relief？ What were his last few days with his father （the subject of many of his stand up bits） like？ Stuff like that。 As long as you go into it expecting essentially a long form stand If you like his stand up or his podcasts， this book is for you。 Had a good amount of laughs and learned some fun tidbits from his life， but there were a few things I had come into this wanting to learn and didn’t。 For example， how did he and Bert Kreischer meet？ What was it like to be in a horror movie as the comic relief？ What were his last few days with his father （the subject of many of his stand up bits） like？ Stuff like that。 As long as you go into it expecting essentially a long form stand up bit then you’ll have a fun time with it。 Maybe he’ll do a follow up “I’d STILL Like to Play Alone， Please”。 。。。more
Courtney
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He’s not my style of funny， but I won’t give it a one star review because of that。 I mean， I will in my heart， but not on Goodreads。 🤷🏼♀️
Ranjini Shankar
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I’m no comedy expert so take my review with a grain of salt。 I’ve watched his special and enjoyed his style but this book just didn’t do it for me。 There were essays that were pretty good but most of them just felt like an excuse to show off the people he’s met and just weren’t very funny。 The opening essay on his dad， his time in Peru and ones about his kids were what I was hoping for but the rest were bland and forgettable。
Wmulroy
，
My main issue with this book is that probably half of it is retellings of Tom's standup bits。 There are a few new tidbits dropped into each， but overall if your a fan of Tom's you have heard most of them before。 If your not a fan why would you even be reading this book？The new parts were pretty entertaining and had me chuckling to myself on multiple occasions。 My main issue with this book is that probably half of it is retellings of Tom's standup bits。 There are a few new tidbits dropped into each， but overall if your a fan of Tom's you have heard most of them before。 If your not a fan why would you even be reading this book？The new parts were pretty entertaining and had me chuckling to myself on multiple occasions。 。。。more
Tyler
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Very funny， but had heard many of the stories before in his standup specials and on podcasts。 Definitely appreciated doing the audiobook to hear his voices animating the characters。 Very easy listen。
Rachel Darby
，
I am a huge fan of Tom Segura， so naturally when I got an email saying I should preorder his book， I did。 I have no regrets。 I have chuckled here and there while reading a book。 However， this particular read made me laugh to an extent that my fiancé paused his video game and asked me what could possibly be making me laugh， as if it was an unfathomable thought the answer was the book I was reading。 There are stories in the book I either heard while watching his Netflix specials or at a show of hi I am a huge fan of Tom Segura， so naturally when I got an email saying I should preorder his book， I did。 I have no regrets。 I have chuckled here and there while reading a book。 However， this particular read made me laugh to an extent that my fiancé paused his video game and asked me what could possibly be making me laugh， as if it was an unfathomable thought the answer was the book I was reading。 There are stories in the book I either heard while watching his Netflix specials or at a show of his I went to， but it’s not verbatim， and there is more added on to the original story。 I enjoyed this collection of essays。 It has earned a spot on my book shelf， to be read once again when I am in need of a laugh。 。。。more
Erik Böhm
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If you have a bad day， just read a couple of pages from this book。 Trust me， it's hilarious！ If you have a bad day， just read a couple of pages from this book。 Trust me， it's hilarious！ 。。。more
Adriaan Glibert
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Uitgelezen op 2 dagen， een record。 Als fan van Tom vond ik het zeker een vast aangenaam en het las als een trein maar de anecdotes waren niet allemaal even goed of interessant。 Veel verhalen kende ik ook al van zijn podcast。 Als je geen fan bent， is dit boek niet voor u。
ayla
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This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 again I’m sorry lolI enjoyed it！ Tom Segura is funny and a great storyteller as always。 In fact， much of what I enjoy is his intonation and I find it to be really unique and add a bunch to his comedy。 However， it was SO clear he was reading from the book when he was reading the audiobook。 His reading was choppy and kind of poor until he was doing bits that he’s clearly done on stage before。 Also he grew up speaking Spanish and it was VERY evident when he spoke those parts。 Awesome！ WHY would he again I’m sorry lolI enjoyed it！ Tom Segura is funny and a great storyteller as always。 In fact， much of what I enjoy is his intonation and I find it to be really unique and add a bunch to his comedy。 However， it was SO clear he was reading from the book when he was reading the audiobook。 His reading was choppy and kind of poor until he was doing bits that he’s clearly done on stage before。 Also he grew up speaking Spanish and it was VERY evident when he spoke those parts。 Awesome！ WHY would he end his debut book with his most popular bit。 Literally why。 I was waiting all book for this A+ ending， and it was the Tyson story？？ Come on！Overall， cute entertaining book， good holdover until next album。Recommend to:- obviously people who like Tom segura- people whose dads are insane but in a good way 。。。more
Madelyn Vaughn
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Listened to this on Audible。 Generally enjoyable， it was kind of like having a conversation with your asshole uncle。 He has good stories and he can definitely make you laugh。 But he’s got some seriously questionable opinions that you might’ve fought him on if you had the energy
Nc Hegarty
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Tom Segura makes me smile。 Proof that big fat party animals can make it。
Matt Doyle
，
Try it out。 If you see it on the shelf， try it out。 If you’d like to come over to my library， try it out man。 Read it， listen to it I’m home here now。
Logan Brandt
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These stories sound corny as shit in writing。 Guess that’s why he’s a stand up first。 Oh well keep featherin it brother。
Fabio （hot guy from library）
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Laughed aloud a few times。 He's definitely funny。 Simple writing style and it's not really one work。 Like the title says， it's a collection of essays， some about his dad， wanting to be a do tor as a kid， time in Peru， and chance encounters with celebrities。 Laughed aloud a few times。 He's definitely funny。 Simple writing style and it's not really one work。 Like the title says， it's a collection of essays， some about his dad， wanting to be a do tor as a kid， time in Peru， and chance encounters with celebrities。 。。。more
John Linehan
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Shorter but sweet and none of the stories overstayed their welcome。 Very funny as expected
Kelly
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Tom’s book， I’d Like To Play Alone， Please， is a compilation of essays that are so relatable and laugh out loud funny。 My favorite chapter is titled West in which Tom explains the nuances of Vero Beach， Florida。 I have never， ever read a more apt description of Vero Beach and Indian River County in my life。 I also live in the county above and travel to Vero Beach for running events and the nice outlet mall。 I also connected to his stories about his oldest son， because my youngest daughter could Tom’s book， I’d Like To Play Alone， Please， is a compilation of essays that are so relatable and laugh out loud funny。 My favorite chapter is titled West in which Tom explains the nuances of Vero Beach， Florida。 I have never， ever read a more apt description of Vero Beach and Indian River County in my life。 I also live in the county above and travel to Vero Beach for running events and the nice outlet mall。 I also connected to his stories about his oldest son， because my youngest daughter could be his twin。 If you don’t have an introvert as a child you may not realize how normal it is to be told they went to play alone as young as two or three。 Tom also includes celebrity meetings while flying first class （where he is often upgraded to） that provide some fun insight into the crazy world celebrities live in。 I learned that Mike Tyson is more human than I thought and Serena Williams is the queen I knew she’d be。 Overall this was a fun book to read and I totally recommend it！ Thank you to Grand Central Publishing for gifting me a copy！ 。。。more
Breeze Horr
，
Tom segura is a riot。 Audiobook is so great。 When he laughs though reading it’s hard not to LOL！
Adam Cormier
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